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Sunday, August 9, 2009

The Beach - Sunday Morning

Good morning everyone,

We successfully made it to our lovely condo in Oceanside, California. We arrived after a long day of travel to the sun setting, and cool air off the water. This morning the sky is blue and the ocean is yards away.

Jim is doing as good as well as can be expected. He is beginning to suffer the effects of the liver toxins building up inhis body and which he is not able to get rid off. This makes him a little uncoordinated, speech slurry, and apparently can eventually lead to a coma. He is being treated with a new medication that may counteract some of the effects of the toxins. He continues to lose weight, though he belly is greatly distended. He weighed 178 at the doctor, and was at 220 in March. They may drain some of the liquid from his belly when we get home to make him more comfortable.

We went to the grocery store when we arrived and we all picked things to eat, Jim is able to eat shrimp, salmon, popsicles, canned pears, and canned peaches. Liana got fruit loops and milk, and pop tarts. I got fresh avocado, tomatoes, bagels and frozen pizza, and lots of fresh fruit, and RUM!

I can't stress how wonderful and yet how poignant this trip is for me. Realizing that this is last time we will follow our same old travel routines, we're like old shoes, we both know which step to take in the process of unpacking, and yet how greatful I am to have this time with Jim and Lily. We've laughed on the plane and here at the condo, and I had a few quiet tears, as I lay in bed last night, but I am determined to not let sadness get the best of me these next few days.

The three of us love each other, and we love our other children and families so much. I feel so lucky to have Lara and Neil, and Matt and Sara, and Kevin involved with their dad. They are all showing such loving kindness toward him and to me. Kathryn and Jill continue to be my guardian angels, and help me all the time. I already miss my little Ami and Aidan, they were sad when they said goodbye to me on Friday, and Ami said "I go wit you" and Aidan said "Please take us Nana" now those words tore my heart.

I wish for all of you blue skies, rain in the right amount, and peace with people in your life. Take advantage of each opportunity to love each other, and be kind to one another. Peace from the ocean - Dawn

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